.a new year.

a new year
but the same thing
the same wasted tears
the same wasted lies
i read between the lines
and the sweet things
you told me to try to
convince me i was wanted
needed
i looked beyond what we had
and what we should've had
and i know i need you
but you dont need me
if you needed to
quite half as much
as you like to imagine
i think we both know
what would happen.

a new year
a new lover
but the same nerves
and sickness and restlessness
nothing new about the
feelings, and the waiting
for the betrayal.

a new year
the same disappointment
the same dysfunctional family
the same blind people
the same depression that
just wont go away.

a new year
we need new medicine
new remedies
to fix everything
thats wrong
to get rid of the old
and in with the new.
a new year
it doesn't feel
at all new,
and theres nothing good
about the start of it.

.nothing but words.

passion of young people
is a thing rarely required
we fall in "love"
are crushed by crushes
but never really
fell or understand the
passion that goes along
with any of it.

when put in our mouths,
it is simply a word
a concept barely grasped
by our teenage brains
and it is meaningless.
nothing but words is all it is.

when we are interested
in something
unless we follow it with
the dedication put in by many
before and many after us
there is nothing in the interest.
its nothing but words.

in a world where
material objects are everything
everything else
is nothing but words

words hold no meaning
words hold no promise
we must have contracts
and written agreements
things we must see
nothing can be held in our
hearts anymore.
words are
nothing but words

letters strung together hold nothing
they dont mean a single thing
to people today.
few people appreciate the power of words
and sometimes those who
appreciate it misuse it.
nothing but words.

nothing is more powerful
than words
but we dont understand that
people today must use psychology
and logic
and only things proven.

science. microscopes.
pictures. proof.
words are no longer good enough
if you cant see it
it doesnt exist.
then what are these things that i write?

i cannot see you.
you cannot see me.
yet my words come across.
this.. this writing,
these feelings,
these recorded thoughts
they are nothing but words.
they are nothing but words.
but they are everything to me.

.i love you.

really somewhere
inside of me is the
love that i cant seem to
express when
you are around..

inside somewhere is the
love that keeps you and i
on opposite sides of this
very complicated line..
ending in you and i apart
you and i apart.
only this isn't what i wanted
understand me.. this isn't what i wanted.

.nothing else.

dont tell me what you think
it'll only mess with my thoughts
i dont understand how your mind works
and im not sure i want to,
but its all okay.
cause i know eventually
it'll just be you and me.
and nothing else.
and nothing else.

dont drag me down
and dont waste your time on me
because theres nothing here
to look at folks
move along
theres nothing to look at
i've been a walking disaster
my whole life
and you dont change that.
you just add to the collision
to the explosion
to the end result.

but in the end it
will all go away
and it will be you and me
and nothing else.
and nothing else.

ahh.

well temporary creative block. any ideas on how to get rid of it?!

ive tried a lot.. i even tried writing about the block. it didnt really work. lol suggestions appreciated. or IM me. catalystx99